In a heartfelt essay, Lisa VanderVeen shares her experiences as a member of the "sandwich generation," balancing the care of her aging parents and her adult daughter while prioritizing personal growth and self-care. Despite the challenges, she finds immense fulfillment in this phase of life. By embracing travel, writing, and fitness, VanderVeen is crafting a fulfilling middle age that promises an adventurous retirement. She reflects on the unexpected joys of learning new skills, forming deep friendships, and finding balance amidst family responsibilities.
VanderVeen's journey through midlife has led her to rediscover activities that bring her joy. After navigating the end of a long marriage, she found solace in pursuing her interests. Travel writing classes have taken her to diverse locations like Nepal, Mexico, San Francisco, and Paris. Each trip not only enriches her storytelling but also fosters meaningful connections within her writing community. Additionally, painting has become a tactile meditation for her, allowing her to express creativity through landscapes and buildings inspired by her travels.
Her mornings are often spent on Florida's west coast, where she indulges in shelling—a passion that connects her to nature and her parents. Her collection of shells serves as a tangible reminder of cherished visits. Learning French has been another avenue for personal growth. Though not yet fluent, her ability to read signs and menus during travels has opened new doors. These pursuits remind her that it's never too late to explore new horizons and cultivate passions that bring genuine happiness.
VanderVeen's approach to middle age includes preparing for a future filled with adventure. With retirement looming, she envisions longer, more daring trips such as camping in Africa, spending a month in India, and hiking Spain’s Camino de Santiago. Observing her mother's decline has underscored the importance of maintaining physical strength and balance. Consequently, she incorporates regular workouts into her routine, ensuring she remains capable of handling the physical demands of travel.
Despite the initial shock of entering the "sandwich years," VanderVeen has discovered that this phase can be incredibly rewarding. By striking a balance between family responsibilities and personal aspirations, she has turned what could have been a challenging period into one of the best years of her life. Her story serves as an inspiring reminder that midlife can be a time of renewal, growth, and self-discovery.